So long time no post. I was out of town for a week helping my dad move and then came back and had to do lots of extra training at work plus some double shifts so its been a bit too long since I’ve written.
Happy belated Fourth of July though. In terms of the greatness of our country, I heard a story today about how a bunch of New Yorkers are protesting building a mosque near (as in a few blocks away from) ground zero because it would be a “shrine to terrorism”. I wonder if they think of churches as a “shrine” to the crusades, the inquisition, the holocaust or child molesters. I am not saying that I think Christians are all those things, but the corollary could very easily be drawn. I also heard a story on NPR about how the teabaggers are saying that the NAACP is…wait for it…racist. So yeah, YAY AMERICA!
But I do hope that anyone serving overseas is safe and gets to come home very, very soon. I also hope that people who are just trying to live their lives in countries like Afghanistan or Iraq are safe. There are a few people that I personally know that are in the military and I really do worry about their safety when they are over there. Because I know them, it is easier for me to be worried about them as individuals. Other than that, I can’t really say that I feel MORE concern for American citizens in war zones than I do for other people that happened to get caught living in a war zone. To me, both cases are situations where people I have never met are in danger and, because they are human beings, I genuinely hope the violence ends and ends soon. But, unlike most people in this country, I do not think of the Americans first and the people in the other countries as a belated afterthought.
I think that I feel that way because I have never really understood patriotism. Obviously I understand the concept but I have never felt that emotion. To me, national borders just seem like what they are, imaginary lines drawn on a map. I mean I get it, there is usually uniting cultures languages etc. that create a sense of community between people in any particular country. However, I have a ton more in common culturally with people from Thunder Bay, Ontario (which is about four hours away from where I went to college) than I do with someone who lives in Hawaii. Or Los Angles or New York City for that matter. The point I am trying to get at is that I think, overall, patriotism seems just a little, well, nonsensical to me.
But we as Americans do have a lot to be proud about. For example, the KFC double down sandwich, the twilight series, scientology not to mention the fact that we have been able to develop a prescription medication to cure…wait for it again…thin eyelashes. But seriously, I have been to a developing country and I am not going to lie, I am glad that I was lucky enough to be born in a country where the living conditions are really high.
But the thing is, and this is the thing I think most “I LOVE THE USA” people should remember, we didn’t do anything to be born here. It’s a crapshoot, basically, and no one who was born a US citizen worked harder or is better than anyone who was born Canadian or Mexican or Swedish or Nigerian so quit acting all high and mighty because of a totally random event that happened to make you a US citizen. And, since I know a lot of patriotism and Fourth of July festivities are aimed at supporting the troops, lets really show our support by ending the war and bringing them home safely.
Plus, the fireworks scared the crap out of my cat and he showed his dissatisfaction with the holiday by yowling and racing around the apartment like a nutcase for hours every time he heard a bottle rocket go off.
Graffitti on the Great Wall of China
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Press One for Racist.
For anyone that complains about having to press one for English: If you are too lazy to PRESS A BUTTON do you really think you are in a position to call other people lazy for not learning a new language?
Yeah, that was my facebook status today because I saw that a few of my facebook friends had joined a group about not wanting to press one for English cause “this is America”. Really? Really? If I saw that some people joined a group that said that they were pissed about having to speak English and not some Native American language, I wouldn’t be so annoyed because those WERE the languages that were spoken here originally before a bunch of immigrants came over and changed everything. They would at least have a valid point that they were the ones that were here first. But do you want to know why I said “some Native American language” and not a specific example? Because I don’t know any, I don’t even know the names of them, because Europeans came to America and wiped out as much of their culture as possible.
But that, apparently, was OK. It was OK when Europeans came to a country with more resources and killed the people and stole their land, but three hundred years later it’s a travesty if Latin Americans want to work here. I mean, really, until there are huge groups of Mexicans coming here and handing out smallpox infected blankets and forcing European Americans live on reservations, shut your fucking mouths you racist, ignorant pricks.
The thing that really gets me is that 95% of my friends live in RURAL Wisconsin. I would honestly like to know how many illegal (or even legal) immigrants you see on a daily, weekly, monthly or even yearly basis. I’m guessing the number is about none.
The number one reasons I have heard that people are against immigrants are “because they take our jobs”. Its pretty convenient that certain Caucasian people I know blame ethnic minorities on skyrocketing unemployment rates; but when those same people talk about African Americans or Hispanics or Native Americans who are unemployed, the reason they give for that is laziness.
See, from my point of view, the problem is not people “stealing” jobs, it is that there aren’t any jobs here anymore. Like I’ve said in other posts, all the jobs have gone to other countries where the labor standards are lower and cost of production is astronomically cheaper. Most people act like the cause of this problem are unions or illegal immigrants…not trying to be rude, but if you believe that, YOU are the reason the system is able to exist.
I mean, think about it. Let’s say there is a guy, we’ll call him Bob. Now Bob owns a company where he needs five people to work for him. In the beginning, Bob hires five white guys. The white guys realize that Bob pays them such low wages that they can’t afford to live and he makes them work in an unsafe work environment so they form a union saying that Bob needs to make them work only eight hours a day, for a living wage and that they can’t work if the conditions are unsafe.
So, Bob says eff that, I will fire the two guys that organized this and hire other people. I will hire two white women cause they will work for less money anyway cause it is harder for them to get a job because of sexism. So the two guys get fired, the workers (now two girls and three guys) go back to work without the job conditions getting any better. And if anyone complains, Bob can just say, hey its not my fault, I am a business owner, I have to increase my profits and women work for less, blame them. Which increases sexism because people have been led to believe that unless women are held back, men will not have as good of chance of becoming successful.
This goes on for awhile until the workers decide again that the system sucks, so they go on strike again. Bob, remembering how good his plan worked before, fires the girl and guy in charge and hires some African American men who will work for less because it is harder for them to get good jobs because of racism and the people go back to work in the shitty work environments. And if anyone complains, Bob can just say, hey its not my fault, I am a business owner and African Americans work for less, blame them. Which increases racism because people have been led to believe that unless other ethnic groups are held back, then they will not have as good of chance of becoming successful.
THIS goes on for awhile until the workers decide again that the system sucks, so they go on strike again. Bob, remembering how good his plan worked before, fires the two in charge and hires some Hispanic woman who will work for less because it is harder for them to get good jobs because of racism AND sexism, the people go back to work in the shitty work environments. And if anyone complains, Bob can just say, hey its not my fault, I am a business owner and Hispanic woman work for less, blame them. Which increases sexism AND racism because people have been led to believe that unless women and ethnic minorities are held back, then they will not have as good of chance of becoming successful.
And during the whole process, the person to blame wasn't the women or the minorities it was Bob, the rich guy who was unwilling to cut into his profits to make sure that his workers could work in a safe environment and support their families. But since racism and sexism are pretty common words and boss-ism or rich person discrimination aren't common ideas, I think it is pretty clear who takes the blame for old Bob's greed.
This scenario could go on and on and on. And it does, everyday. Now though it has gotten even worse because it is on a global scale (hey its not my fault, I am a business owner and Cambodians and the Chinese work for less, blame them.)
The super rich use racism, sexism, homophobia and intolerance of all kinds to make sure that working people are divided into super small, competitive groups so that the working class will never realize that 95% of the people are just barely making it while the rest live in decadent luxury. If that 95% percent would just realize how the system of capitalism works, they would be able to quit working for the rich guys all together and start working for themselves in a socialist democracy where sexism and racism would not be perpetuated in order to divide the working class.
I know every pick-up truck driving, flag-waving, freedom-loving patriot in this country is terrified of socialism, but wake the eff up. Wouldn’t you like to live in a country where you could go to college, get health care and be able to support your family without the fear of losing your home or your job? Wouldn’t you like to live in a country where you were able to have the same opportunities as other people, whether they were born in rich families or not?
And, for the record, if you are so against socialism, you had better watch out because the red terror has already invaded your life. Right now there are (GASP) many socialized institutions in this country…like public schools, post offices and fire departments. And we all know how often the mailman tries to take away our freedom, so I guess your fears are pretty well founded.
So back to my original point, if you are going to complain about having to hear Spanish, I will make sure to write my advice to you in English: Shut the eff up, learn how economics work and why the people are immigrating here to begin with. It isn't because they want to steal your jobs, it is because the US has fucked up the economies in almost every Latin economy. It isn't because they were sitting in nice houses in Mexico and had good jobs and they decided to risk their lives to illegal immigrant here so that they could steal your job and force your kids to speak Spanish. It is because they are trying to survive. They are trying to make sure that their kids don't starve to death and maybe so that their children can have a better life than they do.
You know it's weird, its almost like Latin Americans are trying to do exactly what United States citizens are trying to do, almost like it is a basic human desire to have food, shelter and the opportunity to support your family. But that must not be it, it must be because they hate you...and the English language...and freedom...and probably NFL and strip malls too. So if we can't win the battle to save this idea of white American that everyone seems to love so much, let's at least make sure that Spanish speaking people can't have someone tell them over the phone how much they owe on their cell phone bill in a language they can understand...that will definitely fix the unemployment rate and the economy.
Yeah, that was my facebook status today because I saw that a few of my facebook friends had joined a group about not wanting to press one for English cause “this is America”. Really? Really? If I saw that some people joined a group that said that they were pissed about having to speak English and not some Native American language, I wouldn’t be so annoyed because those WERE the languages that were spoken here originally before a bunch of immigrants came over and changed everything. They would at least have a valid point that they were the ones that were here first. But do you want to know why I said “some Native American language” and not a specific example? Because I don’t know any, I don’t even know the names of them, because Europeans came to America and wiped out as much of their culture as possible.
But that, apparently, was OK. It was OK when Europeans came to a country with more resources and killed the people and stole their land, but three hundred years later it’s a travesty if Latin Americans want to work here. I mean, really, until there are huge groups of Mexicans coming here and handing out smallpox infected blankets and forcing European Americans live on reservations, shut your fucking mouths you racist, ignorant pricks.
The thing that really gets me is that 95% of my friends live in RURAL Wisconsin. I would honestly like to know how many illegal (or even legal) immigrants you see on a daily, weekly, monthly or even yearly basis. I’m guessing the number is about none.
The number one reasons I have heard that people are against immigrants are “because they take our jobs”. Its pretty convenient that certain Caucasian people I know blame ethnic minorities on skyrocketing unemployment rates; but when those same people talk about African Americans or Hispanics or Native Americans who are unemployed, the reason they give for that is laziness.
See, from my point of view, the problem is not people “stealing” jobs, it is that there aren’t any jobs here anymore. Like I’ve said in other posts, all the jobs have gone to other countries where the labor standards are lower and cost of production is astronomically cheaper. Most people act like the cause of this problem are unions or illegal immigrants…not trying to be rude, but if you believe that, YOU are the reason the system is able to exist.
I mean, think about it. Let’s say there is a guy, we’ll call him Bob. Now Bob owns a company where he needs five people to work for him. In the beginning, Bob hires five white guys. The white guys realize that Bob pays them such low wages that they can’t afford to live and he makes them work in an unsafe work environment so they form a union saying that Bob needs to make them work only eight hours a day, for a living wage and that they can’t work if the conditions are unsafe.
So, Bob says eff that, I will fire the two guys that organized this and hire other people. I will hire two white women cause they will work for less money anyway cause it is harder for them to get a job because of sexism. So the two guys get fired, the workers (now two girls and three guys) go back to work without the job conditions getting any better. And if anyone complains, Bob can just say, hey its not my fault, I am a business owner, I have to increase my profits and women work for less, blame them. Which increases sexism because people have been led to believe that unless women are held back, men will not have as good of chance of becoming successful.
This goes on for awhile until the workers decide again that the system sucks, so they go on strike again. Bob, remembering how good his plan worked before, fires the girl and guy in charge and hires some African American men who will work for less because it is harder for them to get good jobs because of racism and the people go back to work in the shitty work environments. And if anyone complains, Bob can just say, hey its not my fault, I am a business owner and African Americans work for less, blame them. Which increases racism because people have been led to believe that unless other ethnic groups are held back, then they will not have as good of chance of becoming successful.
THIS goes on for awhile until the workers decide again that the system sucks, so they go on strike again. Bob, remembering how good his plan worked before, fires the two in charge and hires some Hispanic woman who will work for less because it is harder for them to get good jobs because of racism AND sexism, the people go back to work in the shitty work environments. And if anyone complains, Bob can just say, hey its not my fault, I am a business owner and Hispanic woman work for less, blame them. Which increases sexism AND racism because people have been led to believe that unless women and ethnic minorities are held back, then they will not have as good of chance of becoming successful.
And during the whole process, the person to blame wasn't the women or the minorities it was Bob, the rich guy who was unwilling to cut into his profits to make sure that his workers could work in a safe environment and support their families. But since racism and sexism are pretty common words and boss-ism or rich person discrimination aren't common ideas, I think it is pretty clear who takes the blame for old Bob's greed.
This scenario could go on and on and on. And it does, everyday. Now though it has gotten even worse because it is on a global scale (hey its not my fault, I am a business owner and Cambodians and the Chinese work for less, blame them.)
The super rich use racism, sexism, homophobia and intolerance of all kinds to make sure that working people are divided into super small, competitive groups so that the working class will never realize that 95% of the people are just barely making it while the rest live in decadent luxury. If that 95% percent would just realize how the system of capitalism works, they would be able to quit working for the rich guys all together and start working for themselves in a socialist democracy where sexism and racism would not be perpetuated in order to divide the working class.
I know every pick-up truck driving, flag-waving, freedom-loving patriot in this country is terrified of socialism, but wake the eff up. Wouldn’t you like to live in a country where you could go to college, get health care and be able to support your family without the fear of losing your home or your job? Wouldn’t you like to live in a country where you were able to have the same opportunities as other people, whether they were born in rich families or not?
And, for the record, if you are so against socialism, you had better watch out because the red terror has already invaded your life. Right now there are (GASP) many socialized institutions in this country…like public schools, post offices and fire departments. And we all know how often the mailman tries to take away our freedom, so I guess your fears are pretty well founded.
So back to my original point, if you are going to complain about having to hear Spanish, I will make sure to write my advice to you in English: Shut the eff up, learn how economics work and why the people are immigrating here to begin with. It isn't because they want to steal your jobs, it is because the US has fucked up the economies in almost every Latin economy. It isn't because they were sitting in nice houses in Mexico and had good jobs and they decided to risk their lives to illegal immigrant here so that they could steal your job and force your kids to speak Spanish. It is because they are trying to survive. They are trying to make sure that their kids don't starve to death and maybe so that their children can have a better life than they do.
You know it's weird, its almost like Latin Americans are trying to do exactly what United States citizens are trying to do, almost like it is a basic human desire to have food, shelter and the opportunity to support your family. But that must not be it, it must be because they hate you...and the English language...and freedom...and probably NFL and strip malls too. So if we can't win the battle to save this idea of white American that everyone seems to love so much, let's at least make sure that Spanish speaking people can't have someone tell them over the phone how much they owe on their cell phone bill in a language they can understand...that will definitely fix the unemployment rate and the economy.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Breaking News: Multibillion Dollar a Year Oil Company Doesn’t Really Care About the Environment or People!
I am shocked at what I hear about BP on the news. Don’t get me wrong, I am not shocked to hear that they knew the oil spill was much, much larger than they first said. I am not shocked to hear that they could be using four times as many boats to help the cleanup effort but aren’t because it is too expensive. I am not shocked to learn that they were knowingly operating under unsafe conditions or that they are trying to cheat the people that they hurt out of compensation. What I am shocked about is that everyone else seems to find this surprising.
I am guessing that there isn’t a single person in the United States that doesn’t know about the effects of the oil spill. If you turn on CNN, MSNBC, or even (gag) Fox "news", the coverage is basically streaming footage of the oil soaked pelicans, the pools of dirty ocean water, tar balls and interviews with fishermen and women who no longer have a source of income. It is all very poignant and disturbing and I am glad that they are showing it but I still think that there is a very large part of the story that they are leaving out.
There is an old expression about journalism that says, "if it bleeds, it reads". In other words, heartstring tugging footage or violent scary stories generate more interest that a report that focuses on things like statistics and in-depth analysis of an issue. Media today is centered a lot more on revenue than it ever was before so I get why it’s happening. However, people should know that things like the oil spill (and Haiti and Katrina and the Tsunami and many others for that matter) all have a common thread, they are caused by neoliberalism and greed. In other words, our profit driven system of social and economic policy (i.e. capitalism!) is to blame.
In the eighties, the whole idea of neoliberalism and free market economics began to emerge. This meant that governments (and the US was definitely in the forefront of this) began to take a hands-off stance on big business. The free market policy has a good sounding name, especially in the US where we love the word freedom almost as much as we love McDonalds and SUVs, but what it basically means that trade and commerce are free of government regulation. This means that companies like BP can run a company that endangers its workers and the environment without being shut down.
I suppose there are some of you (out of the millions and millions of people that read my blog everyday) that are saying "Wait a minute, what do you mean they are allowed to run them that way? Didn’t you see on CNN where it said that BP violated like 800 safety codes? If they violated them, obviously there are regulations in place. And haven’t you heard that the government is going to make them pay for they did? Obviously they aren’t just being allowed to walk away from this mess that they made."
You’d be right in a sense, but think about it for a minute. They did violate safety codes, it is documented that they were told this…but the operation was still running. That’s the thing, there aren’t nearly enough regulations in place and the ones that exist aren’t enforced that much. In other words, they get a slap on the wrist if they violate the regulations and there are a bunch of other ways that they should be regulated but they aren't.
Last year BP was fined $87 million dollar for having "willing" errors in safety violations. $87 million sounds like A LOT of money but last year alone BP had a profit margin of 14 BILLION dollars. Billion! So $87 million is only 0.6% of their profits!So, for knowingly operating in hazardous, life-threatening conditions, for every hundred dollars that BP made, they had to pay sixty cents
Paying a little fine must have seemed like a pretty inexpensive fix compared to what it would have cost to fix the safety problems. I mean, there was also the lives that were lost when the rig exploded, the livelihoods that were lost by ruining the economy of the gulf, not to mention the poisoning of an enormous ecosystem but those loses don’t come out of the BP pocketbook so those don’t really count right?
One way that it is justified is that it creates jobs, even though the system also advocates cutting any and every job possible if it means that the profit rate could be increased even more. Another reason people say it’s good is because it fosters business growth, which I guess means that we should let big businesses operate dangerously without punishing them so that they can get even bigger and have even more money to pay fines instead of fixing problems.
Either way, for every person in America and around the world that isn't a multimillionaire we are letting ourselves get screwed by rich people so that they can make more money. Right now, The wealth of the top one percent of US households exceeds the combined household wealth of the bottom 95 percent. That means that if 95% of the people in the United States put all of our money together, it would still be less than the richest one percent! And not by a little, the top one percent have more than fifty percent of the wealth in this country. They are the ones that are making the money out of ruining the environment. They are the ones that willing put workers' health and homes in danger in order to add to their billion dollar a year profit margins. And we let them, cause someone who was really eff-ing smart put the word "free" in front of trade and convinced the American public that it was our patriotic duty to support this insanity.
And as for BP and the government making sure that the lives of the people in the gulf are restored to what they were before the oil spill? Well I’ll believe that might have even a tiny possibility of happening as soon as the victims from hurricane Katrina aren’t still living next to ruined houses in the "temporary" FEMA trailers that they were given five years ago.
I am guessing that there isn’t a single person in the United States that doesn’t know about the effects of the oil spill. If you turn on CNN, MSNBC, or even (gag) Fox "news", the coverage is basically streaming footage of the oil soaked pelicans, the pools of dirty ocean water, tar balls and interviews with fishermen and women who no longer have a source of income. It is all very poignant and disturbing and I am glad that they are showing it but I still think that there is a very large part of the story that they are leaving out.
There is an old expression about journalism that says, "if it bleeds, it reads". In other words, heartstring tugging footage or violent scary stories generate more interest that a report that focuses on things like statistics and in-depth analysis of an issue. Media today is centered a lot more on revenue than it ever was before so I get why it’s happening. However, people should know that things like the oil spill (and Haiti and Katrina and the Tsunami and many others for that matter) all have a common thread, they are caused by neoliberalism and greed. In other words, our profit driven system of social and economic policy (i.e. capitalism!) is to blame.
In the eighties, the whole idea of neoliberalism and free market economics began to emerge. This meant that governments (and the US was definitely in the forefront of this) began to take a hands-off stance on big business. The free market policy has a good sounding name, especially in the US where we love the word freedom almost as much as we love McDonalds and SUVs, but what it basically means that trade and commerce are free of government regulation. This means that companies like BP can run a company that endangers its workers and the environment without being shut down.
I suppose there are some of you (out of the millions and millions of people that read my blog everyday) that are saying "Wait a minute, what do you mean they are allowed to run them that way? Didn’t you see on CNN where it said that BP violated like 800 safety codes? If they violated them, obviously there are regulations in place. And haven’t you heard that the government is going to make them pay for they did? Obviously they aren’t just being allowed to walk away from this mess that they made."
You’d be right in a sense, but think about it for a minute. They did violate safety codes, it is documented that they were told this…but the operation was still running. That’s the thing, there aren’t nearly enough regulations in place and the ones that exist aren’t enforced that much. In other words, they get a slap on the wrist if they violate the regulations and there are a bunch of other ways that they should be regulated but they aren't.
Last year BP was fined $87 million dollar for having "willing" errors in safety violations. $87 million sounds like A LOT of money but last year alone BP had a profit margin of 14 BILLION dollars. Billion! So $87 million is only 0.6% of their profits!So, for knowingly operating in hazardous, life-threatening conditions, for every hundred dollars that BP made, they had to pay sixty cents
Paying a little fine must have seemed like a pretty inexpensive fix compared to what it would have cost to fix the safety problems. I mean, there was also the lives that were lost when the rig exploded, the livelihoods that were lost by ruining the economy of the gulf, not to mention the poisoning of an enormous ecosystem but those loses don’t come out of the BP pocketbook so those don’t really count right?
One way that it is justified is that it creates jobs, even though the system also advocates cutting any and every job possible if it means that the profit rate could be increased even more. Another reason people say it’s good is because it fosters business growth, which I guess means that we should let big businesses operate dangerously without punishing them so that they can get even bigger and have even more money to pay fines instead of fixing problems.
Either way, for every person in America and around the world that isn't a multimillionaire we are letting ourselves get screwed by rich people so that they can make more money. Right now, The wealth of the top one percent of US households exceeds the combined household wealth of the bottom 95 percent. That means that if 95% of the people in the United States put all of our money together, it would still be less than the richest one percent! And not by a little, the top one percent have more than fifty percent of the wealth in this country. They are the ones that are making the money out of ruining the environment. They are the ones that willing put workers' health and homes in danger in order to add to their billion dollar a year profit margins. And we let them, cause someone who was really eff-ing smart put the word "free" in front of trade and convinced the American public that it was our patriotic duty to support this insanity.
And as for BP and the government making sure that the lives of the people in the gulf are restored to what they were before the oil spill? Well I’ll believe that might have even a tiny possibility of happening as soon as the victims from hurricane Katrina aren’t still living next to ruined houses in the "temporary" FEMA trailers that they were given five years ago.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Some Torture then The Bookstore
Ugh, had a dentist appointment this morning. I was going to write a longer post about being home for the weekend and all the stuff that was happening but it will have to wait until my face isn’t throbbing. I hate the dentist, hate it more than anything in the world. Its not even the pain that I hate so much as the needles they use to numb your mouth…basically makes me want to pass out.
Correction, it usually makes me want to pass out, today it actually DID make me pass out. I got super dizzy and then kind of woke up when the dentist was like "she’s looking awfully pale, (which must have meant I was REALLY pale, cause I am basically albino to begin with) are you ok?" I answered "eemmm uhhuth ermmmm" because my tongue was numb and his hand was in my mouth, but what I meant was yes, I am fine please continue to shove long, scary needles into my gums.
As soon as that was over, N. took me to the bookstore. I love the bookstore even more than I hate the dentist. When I was a kid, I remember being bribed into getting cavities filled or getting a shot by the promise that we could stop at a bookstore on the way home. Usually this resulted in me following my mom around the store with an armload of books and a lopsided, half-numb mouth trying to convince her that I needed a new Goosebumps book, a new Sweet Valley book AND a new Babysitters Club.
Luckily N., who normally tries to politely remind me about electricity bills and the rent when he sees that I have collected a pile of books and am still looking, is pretty charitable when it comes to post-torture bookstore visits. So even though I am dead broke after paying for the dentist, he bought me three new books. Ah, love.
I watched that show "To Catch a Predator" for the first time today. Kind of sets a weird precedent for what the media can be involved with in terms of law enforcement but I can’t really work up any anger towards the makers of the show because I have no sympathy for the yucks that they are busting. I was actually glad that those people were shown for what they are on national television. If I had it my way, I think the punishment actually might be a little worse, maybe some scarlet letter justice. They could have "disgusting pervert" tatooed on thier forehead or something.
Still a weird concept for a show, it is a little too disturbing for my tastes. I mean the content is obviously disturbing, but I also felt like a big weird-o for watching it. Have you ever read Fahrenheit 451? (If you haven't, why not? You should go do it as soon as you done reading this, its amazing) There is a scene in the book where the hound is chasing Guy Montage, the fireman, and it is broadcast on everyone’s tv walls. When I was watching that show, I kind of felt like that and also like I was being entertained by a show centered child molestation. Creepy either way.
But enough ruminating about the perversion of the media, I am going to put on my pajamas, crawl into bed and enjoy one of my new books until the pain pill the dentist gave me knocks me out.
Correction, it usually makes me want to pass out, today it actually DID make me pass out. I got super dizzy and then kind of woke up when the dentist was like "she’s looking awfully pale, (which must have meant I was REALLY pale, cause I am basically albino to begin with) are you ok?" I answered "eemmm uhhuth ermmmm" because my tongue was numb and his hand was in my mouth, but what I meant was yes, I am fine please continue to shove long, scary needles into my gums.
As soon as that was over, N. took me to the bookstore. I love the bookstore even more than I hate the dentist. When I was a kid, I remember being bribed into getting cavities filled or getting a shot by the promise that we could stop at a bookstore on the way home. Usually this resulted in me following my mom around the store with an armload of books and a lopsided, half-numb mouth trying to convince her that I needed a new Goosebumps book, a new Sweet Valley book AND a new Babysitters Club.
Luckily N., who normally tries to politely remind me about electricity bills and the rent when he sees that I have collected a pile of books and am still looking, is pretty charitable when it comes to post-torture bookstore visits. So even though I am dead broke after paying for the dentist, he bought me three new books. Ah, love.
I watched that show "To Catch a Predator" for the first time today. Kind of sets a weird precedent for what the media can be involved with in terms of law enforcement but I can’t really work up any anger towards the makers of the show because I have no sympathy for the yucks that they are busting. I was actually glad that those people were shown for what they are on national television. If I had it my way, I think the punishment actually might be a little worse, maybe some scarlet letter justice. They could have "disgusting pervert" tatooed on thier forehead or something.
Still a weird concept for a show, it is a little too disturbing for my tastes. I mean the content is obviously disturbing, but I also felt like a big weird-o for watching it. Have you ever read Fahrenheit 451? (If you haven't, why not? You should go do it as soon as you done reading this, its amazing) There is a scene in the book where the hound is chasing Guy Montage, the fireman, and it is broadcast on everyone’s tv walls. When I was watching that show, I kind of felt like that and also like I was being entertained by a show centered child molestation. Creepy either way.
But enough ruminating about the perversion of the media, I am going to put on my pajamas, crawl into bed and enjoy one of my new books until the pain pill the dentist gave me knocks me out.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Emo T-Rex....(mostly rambling about high school)
About to go home in the morning, or rather, to my parents house. I haven’t lived in that town for six years but I still think of it as home, which is weird because from the age of like, ten the only thing I looked forward to was turning 18 and moving far, far away. That is exactly what I did and I would never move back but I am getting to like visiting it.
It wasn’t because of my parents that I disliked it. I mean, of course I went through the usual teenage phase of being totally and utterly mortified but every single thing that they did but for I actually have a better relationship with my parents than almost anyone else I know.
Back to my original point, it surprises me that I have gotten to the point in my life where visiting my hometown is actually exciting. I remember when I was in high school I’d throw tantrums, not just whining, not just complaining, but full out bawling, screaming teenage tantrums BEGGING my parents to send me to move or send me to a boarding school or let me live with a relative in a different town. To let me do anything that would make it so I didn’t have to go back to that school.
I can’t exactly remember what about it was so horrible. It wasn’t like I was teased or bullied, in fact even though I was never popular, I had a few very close friends, liked most of the people and there were only one or two people that I actively disliked. Just never really fit in. I somehow managed to get a reputation for being wild, which was weird because while I smoked cigarettes, besides the normal experimenting a few times, I didn’t really drink or do drugs. Nevertheless, there were a lot of people in school that thought I was a pretty big party animal.
My closest friend through school, we’ll call her T, who did even less "bad" things than me was also considered fairly wild. Which is pretty funny, because there were many, many times when we would get invited to a party or asked to go do something but instead would go to my dad’s house (now this is where you can tell I am insanely wild) and would spend the night…reading library books. Seriously, we’d get home from school, put on comfy pajama clothes, and talk and read in the living room until we felt like sleeping. If we got bored with that, she would play the Sims on my dad’s computer while I played the piano or watched TV. There were times when we would be at a party and pretend that we were going to another party and just go back to one of our houses, to read. I was like the opposite of every other teenager in the world, instead of lying to my parents saying I was going to sleep over at a friend’s so I could really go to a party, I lied to my friends so I could get out of the party so I could sleep over at T.’s to read books. FYI, I still talk to her about every other day and when we get together now, as adults, we usually do the exact same thing.
I think part of the reason people thought that I was sort of a bad apple was because I missed a lot of school. I am sure most people thought that I was skipping with my friends (which is something I did exactly three times in my life and got caught and in a ton of trouble every time). I did miss a lot of school, but it was usually because I was sick or hadn’t slept the night before. I have fibromyalgia but didn’t get diagnosed until I was 19, so it wasn’t until then that I realized my chronic mystery illnesses and insomnia (AKA going two or three days in a row without sleeping) had a medical reason. I used to get in trouble with teachers a lot for it too, especially one teacher who acted like me not being there held everyone else in the class back too. Though to be fair to her, the only thing I know how to say in French, which was the class she taught and I took it from 7th grade to junior year, is "I speak English", "I cannot speak French", and some random numbers, nouns and swear words.
That was a long rambling tangent, but back to the high school thing, it wasn’t just that I didn’t feel like I fit in at the school, I felt like I was a big weird-o compared to almost everyone else in town. I didn’t care about the football team, school spirit and gym class was the bane of my existence. I didn’t like to go four wheeling, snowmobile, ice fish, fish, hunt, shine for deer, play sports, drink alcohol, go to parties or go to school dances (never went to a prom, homecoming, or anything like that in my life, and even though multiple people told me I’d regret not going I never have).
So yeah, like a billion other people I didn’t really like my hometown or high school, but I am getting to the point where I can at least appreciate my hometown and get excited when I go and visit my family and the friends I have that still live there. But I’d NEVER move back, I need to live in an area that has a bookstore, mall, museums, and restaurants in easy access. From my dad’s house it is almost an hour long drive to even get to a Wal-Mart, so if you need anything you have to try and make it into town before like, 4 o’clock to see if it might be at the Piggly Wiggly otherwise you are out of luck. Speaking of being way out in the middle of nowhere, don’t expect another blog post for a few days. My dad’s house has no cell phone reception or Internet connection (‘cause apparently the house is located in 1992).
Side note, I am watching a documentary on birds (because I am really cool like that). Did you know that ostriches eat rocks with their food to grind up their food for them? Did you ever hear of a terror bird? It’s like a Baby t-rex and an emo combined. Also, I would really like a pet owl. They look neat. Ha, I just noticed that I wrote emo instead of emu but I am going to leave it because the visual that I get when I think about an emo t-rex is pretty amazing. Just picture them running around, wrist bands on their teeny, little arms and dyed purple, floppy hair over their big heads. On that note, good night.
It wasn’t because of my parents that I disliked it. I mean, of course I went through the usual teenage phase of being totally and utterly mortified but every single thing that they did but for I actually have a better relationship with my parents than almost anyone else I know.
Back to my original point, it surprises me that I have gotten to the point in my life where visiting my hometown is actually exciting. I remember when I was in high school I’d throw tantrums, not just whining, not just complaining, but full out bawling, screaming teenage tantrums BEGGING my parents to send me to move or send me to a boarding school or let me live with a relative in a different town. To let me do anything that would make it so I didn’t have to go back to that school.
I can’t exactly remember what about it was so horrible. It wasn’t like I was teased or bullied, in fact even though I was never popular, I had a few very close friends, liked most of the people and there were only one or two people that I actively disliked. Just never really fit in. I somehow managed to get a reputation for being wild, which was weird because while I smoked cigarettes, besides the normal experimenting a few times, I didn’t really drink or do drugs. Nevertheless, there were a lot of people in school that thought I was a pretty big party animal.
My closest friend through school, we’ll call her T, who did even less "bad" things than me was also considered fairly wild. Which is pretty funny, because there were many, many times when we would get invited to a party or asked to go do something but instead would go to my dad’s house (now this is where you can tell I am insanely wild) and would spend the night…reading library books. Seriously, we’d get home from school, put on comfy pajama clothes, and talk and read in the living room until we felt like sleeping. If we got bored with that, she would play the Sims on my dad’s computer while I played the piano or watched TV. There were times when we would be at a party and pretend that we were going to another party and just go back to one of our houses, to read. I was like the opposite of every other teenager in the world, instead of lying to my parents saying I was going to sleep over at a friend’s so I could really go to a party, I lied to my friends so I could get out of the party so I could sleep over at T.’s to read books. FYI, I still talk to her about every other day and when we get together now, as adults, we usually do the exact same thing.
I think part of the reason people thought that I was sort of a bad apple was because I missed a lot of school. I am sure most people thought that I was skipping with my friends (which is something I did exactly three times in my life and got caught and in a ton of trouble every time). I did miss a lot of school, but it was usually because I was sick or hadn’t slept the night before. I have fibromyalgia but didn’t get diagnosed until I was 19, so it wasn’t until then that I realized my chronic mystery illnesses and insomnia (AKA going two or three days in a row without sleeping) had a medical reason. I used to get in trouble with teachers a lot for it too, especially one teacher who acted like me not being there held everyone else in the class back too. Though to be fair to her, the only thing I know how to say in French, which was the class she taught and I took it from 7th grade to junior year, is "I speak English", "I cannot speak French", and some random numbers, nouns and swear words.
That was a long rambling tangent, but back to the high school thing, it wasn’t just that I didn’t feel like I fit in at the school, I felt like I was a big weird-o compared to almost everyone else in town. I didn’t care about the football team, school spirit and gym class was the bane of my existence. I didn’t like to go four wheeling, snowmobile, ice fish, fish, hunt, shine for deer, play sports, drink alcohol, go to parties or go to school dances (never went to a prom, homecoming, or anything like that in my life, and even though multiple people told me I’d regret not going I never have).
So yeah, like a billion other people I didn’t really like my hometown or high school, but I am getting to the point where I can at least appreciate my hometown and get excited when I go and visit my family and the friends I have that still live there. But I’d NEVER move back, I need to live in an area that has a bookstore, mall, museums, and restaurants in easy access. From my dad’s house it is almost an hour long drive to even get to a Wal-Mart, so if you need anything you have to try and make it into town before like, 4 o’clock to see if it might be at the Piggly Wiggly otherwise you are out of luck. Speaking of being way out in the middle of nowhere, don’t expect another blog post for a few days. My dad’s house has no cell phone reception or Internet connection (‘cause apparently the house is located in 1992).
Side note, I am watching a documentary on birds (because I am really cool like that). Did you know that ostriches eat rocks with their food to grind up their food for them? Did you ever hear of a terror bird? It’s like a Baby t-rex and an emo combined. Also, I would really like a pet owl. They look neat. Ha, I just noticed that I wrote emo instead of emu but I am going to leave it because the visual that I get when I think about an emo t-rex is pretty amazing. Just picture them running around, wrist bands on their teeny, little arms and dyed purple, floppy hair over their big heads. On that note, good night.
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